Shatford Thurston

So, I've grown to like my brother-in-law Stephen. He's a good guy, a devoted father and a good husband for my sister. But one thing he can never be allowed to do is name his children.

When Teena was pregnant with her first child, several awful names were suggested. Most notably "Never". Never. As in: Never going to get a job. Never will have a girlfriend. Never will receive birthday gifts from uncle Tony. Never. Thankfully, cooler heads prevailed and Kianna was chosen as a name. Kianna. As in: Kianna won a Nobel Peace Prize. Kianna was elected prime minister. Kianna has that kind of a ring to it.

So now a new bun is in the oven, and the name game is being played again. The name "Shatford" is being discussed. The logical short form of this name is the past tense of a swearword. They dismissed the much better name of Dominic for fear that the child may be mocked as "Dumb Dom". SHATFORD. SHAT - FORD. I'm sure kids won't be able to think of anything to say about that. Another name being batted around is Jackson. Good name. Wrong name combination. My sister's last name is Frost. I've always wanted to name my child "Tinker" but realize it will not be possible for obvious reasons.

Anyway, I needed to vent. And now I have.

Shatford.